Go Beyond

So, perhaps I have not quit OkCupid after all :-/. Still on the site.

What bothers me the most, is maybe not really the site's fault. It's mine. When
I see hundreds of girl's profiles, they become less than people. They become
objectified characteristics that I review based on criteria, and then move
along. It's incredibly jugdgemental, never really purposeful. I don't feel like
it adds meaning to my life to compare people on such a plane. I could just not
do it, but I feel drawn to with the people-in-bulk aspect of the site.

I highly dislike it, but it makes people disposible. I become disposible in ways
that people would never dream of doing in real life. I never get the chance to
prove myself, or prove who I am. I'm just words on a screen, one of the
millions. When I'm one of millions of texts, why would you get to know me? What
is special about me at all?

I'd like to do something useful with my life. Browsing OkCupid, hoping to find
someone human in my mind's most robotic place, seems pointless. It's not
entirely, just really grips me.

I think this post sounds like a Marilyn Manson song.