Go Beyond

Written by Teran McKinney
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A hundred ways that you can die tomorrow

I think that there are three things worth doing in life:

A) Things that change the world.
B) Things that change yourself.
C) Things that make the above possible.

Now, here's a list of a hundred ways that you can possibly die tomorrow:

001. Hit by a train.
002. Heart attack.
003. Stress.
004. Lethal spider bite.
005. Blunt trauma.
006. Stabbed.
007. Fire.
008. Falling.
009. Going crazy around a hitchiker with a hatchet.
010. Ran over by a car.
011. Fall off your motorcycle, off a bridge.
012. Shooting accident at the gun range.
013. Federal government labels you as a domestic terrorist and you are killed by the military.
014. Nuclear bomb goes off near you.
015. Angry spouse kills you with a coffee pot.
016. Coconut falls on your head.
017. Attacked by a shark.
018. Plane crash.
019. Drug bust to the wrong house, shot on sight when you try to defend yourself.
020. Tire bursts in your car in front of a semi or lifted truck. Ran over on the interstate.
021. STD.
022. Tall shelf of books in a library falls on you.
023. Fall off a ladder.
024. Boss gets angry at you and kills you.
025. Fire from cooking.
026. Carbon monoxide poisoning.
026. Gas stove left on without a flame, then a sudden spark.
027. Being held at gun point and accidentally shot due to poor trigger control.
028. Losing the will to live.
029. You've been feeling terribly sick for a few days and found out you were poisoned with Ricin.
030. Anaphylaxic shock after eating lunch.
031. You contract a rare, highly-contagious disease and are killed off to prevent further infection.
032. You're cutting a log and miss the log, axe hits your leg and you bleed to death.
033. Bear attack.
034. Stressful day at work leading to alcohol poisoning that night.
035. Your work place is bombed while you are listening to your obnoxious boss.
036. You find an old bottle of liquor and don't realize it was poisoned back in the prohibition period.
037. Your Craigslist date turns out to be a serial killer.
038. You are shoved off your balcony.
039. French teacher is disgusted that you cannot roll your R's. Stabs you with a pencil up the nose.
040. America takes further downward steps towards socialism and you try to live like a free person.
041. Motorcycle tire bursts in a corner with traffic coming towards you in the other lane.
042. Some guy is tired from a boring job and drives into your lane without seeing you.
043. GPS-guided missile has a tiny software bug that causes it to go off course and hit you, instead.
044. As you're reading this, your coworker snaps and begins beating people with his laptop.
045. You're in an ambulance, already quite injured, and the ambulance is in a crash of its own.
046. Confused after finding out that your "parents" aren't your real parents, you don't look where you're going when crossing the street.
047. You work at a nuclear power plant and it has a melt down with you near the core.
048. You're an astronaut in a space ship and someone confused milimeters with inch-fractions on a single measurement.
049. You anger the wrong person and he turns out to be a mafia member.
050. You help an old lady across the road and she drags you into a car.
051. You've been drinking a lot and didn't know that your weed was laced with enough LSD to kill you, combining it with the alcohol.
052. Reloading a bunch of ammo, you're getting tired and accidentally set the primer off on one of your fresh rounds.
053. You refuse to sign a traffic ticket and a cop isn't feel particularily nice, and tasers you. You have a pacemaker.
054. One of a few million lines of code isn't spot on, and a drone strike happens on your house, instead of in a field.
055. A draft is called and you are killed in training through over exertion and heat stroke.
056. You're counseling someone with multiple personalities, and his serial killer side comes out.
057. Your neighbor does the wrong kind of bath salts and starts eating your face.
058. Tornado comes through your neighborhood and slams a car into you.
059. Drowning.
060. You're a tractor mechanic and someone activates a hydraulic piston that you're working on.
061. Chain snaps at speed on your motorcycle, cuts through your leg and you fall off.
062. You drive a front engined, rear wheel drive car and the flywheel breaks off, flys through the transmission bell housing, cuts off your leg, and you bleed to death after crashing.
063. You're filling up at the gas station and someone smokes a little too much next to his gas cans.
064. Playing Nintendo Wii without a strap, controller flys into the screen. Owner is angry and bashes your skull in with his fists.
065. Doctor cuts the wrong thing in surgey.
066. Airplane crashes into your house.
067. The cottage cheese and canned fruit you had for breakfast was poisoned at the factory. You missed the recall notice.
068. You're listening to your music with headphones. Robbers break into your house and shoot you before you know it.
069. Spiteful girlfriend thinks you cheated on her, and cuts off your testicles. You lose the will to live.
070. Hearing is impaired after a concert, don't notice the car when walking across the road.
071. Someone in chemistry class makes a bomb and ignites it without knowing what he's doing.
072. You work as a trash delivery man and get crushed by the bed dumping at the wrong timing.
073. Your friend left a ratchet on the engine's shaft. He starts it, it springs out and smashes through your face.
074. You started work as a farmer, not knowing the ground had one more mine left in it.
075. Attacked by a honey badger.
076. Picking up the phone to your boss letting you know about a pay raise, you don't notice the car swerving into you on the sidewalk.
077. You say something politically incorrect and mildly racist. You're killed the next day.
078. Cleaning your gun and looking down the barrel, but forgot to check the breech.
079. Driving behind a logging truck with the logs not secured quite right. Semi brakes hard and one falls out through your windshield.
080. Making a hard corner around a cliff and didn't know about the recent oil spill.
081. Driving fast to impress your date, and don't notice black ice. She's killed, but you're fine. Her father kills you in a rage.
082. Lose balance while hiking up a cliff and fall off.
083. Entered a diving competition and bent your neck the wrong way at a 100 foot jump.
084. Kid is crossing the road with traffic. You run out to try and save him, push him out of the way, and then get ran over yourself.
085. Friends pull a joke on you by "robbing" you at gun point. Don't realize the gun is loaded.
086. Hunting a wild boar and run out of ammo after a misplaced shot.
087. Cabin loses pressure at 20,000 feet. You suffocate and freeze to death.
088. Someone at Lowes isn't looking where they're going and skewers you with the forklift.
089. Confess to a crime you didn't commit and are sentenced to death.
090. Too much peanut in your almond butter. Forgot your epinephrine pen.
091. Walking around in your yard and disturb a massive colony of Africanized bees.
092. African safari gone wrong and you're eaten by a lion.
093. You're a woman on her period, swimming in the ocean. Eaten by a shark.
094. Mountain biking down the side of a cliff. Your tubed tires are not inflated much and come off the rim.
095. Skydiving doesn't quite work out.
096. You're in a submarine and the nuclear reactor melts down.
097. Accept a FedEx package, to find a couple hours later it was a bomb from an angry employee.
098. Accidentally shield Ted Nugent from an angry fan's gun shot.
099. Become the president and attempt to take down the Fed.
100. Preparing a body for the grave, you glue his eyes shut. A few minutes later, you're shot in the back. Body is taken. It was Michael Jackson's body.

So are you really spending today how you should be if you'll die tomorrow?




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