Go Beyond

Only read if you don't mind being offended.


" My eyes were crusted and dry. I tried to peel them to a squint and found my normal reflex was not enough. I consciously peeled them open, letting in a glimmer of red light. I yawned, sat up, and faced the East.

A haze formed over the ocean and met the sun about half-way, receding to a an otherwise clear sky, sprinkled with white.

It took a few tries for me to determine the time shown on my watch. 5:49. I knew it was going to be a long day.

By 6:30 I was out on the water. My vessel was small, rough, and surprisingly effective. I mean, at catching fish. Anyways, I was past the Golden Gate making good time. I arrived at my second home around 6:52. I could never figure out whether procrastination meant I got the same amount of work done faster. Either way, I was not going to find out that day.

I baited the nets and cast them into the water, giving me a chance to sit back. The sun was turning orange; I could already feel my red skin crisping again. Imagine that!

As my usual, I lost track of time around this point. That is, until I glanced at my watch. 7:15. The funny thing is, I thought to do this after the boat was spun, not to mention the violent sounds beneath. Beyond ritual that silly ritual, I was panicking.

I wasn't sure what was under the boat, but beyond it were several fins sticking up, circling. Remembering I wasn't defenseless, I ran and jumped after the furtherest one. He was a little slippery, so I screamed at it and reached for my knife. A few tumbles and skipped heartbeats later, I had my knife in hand, knife in eye. I tell you, the eye is the place to get them!

I don't really remember what happened after that. I remember looking down and seeing my leg sinking in the water. Something was wrong and I guess that could've been it.

Somehow, fate has it I ended up with you lot. "

Looking around, I saw I had not lost interest. There were a few laughs from the jellyfish, who then left. Most of the crowd still looked mortified.

"Did it hurt...? I mean, what's a leg anyways?", said the sea cucumber.

"When you were a human, did you have to go underwater to breathe?"

"Question... do you feel guilty hunting us fish? Would you have killed me for food?", said the puffer fish.

I sighed. "Sir, I don't know if you can tell or not, but I am a salmon. I kill for my life. I'm glad I didn't come back as some kinda vegetarian algae-eating fish."

The crowd laughed, I smiled. Or, I tried to use some muscle that used to involve my face.

A barracuda kept eying me in the back. After they finished asking question, I swam over to her. I cleared my throat. "Ma'am, I know you can eat me. But I have a better proposition to make. You see all these lesser fish? You and I can eat for a week with this crowd. I'll catch you some dinner if you pretend to smile and enjoy it."

She nodded in return and expressed a mix of sinister wit and cuteness I hadn't seen in a long time. We both swam away from each other. I saw a fish, a big fish. It looked too cute to be useful. An angel fish? I dunno. The fish looked tasty, my thoughts continued.

I swam up underneath it and bit. He squirmed in my mouth! I bit again, and again. The squirming turned limp. Blood covered my eyes and filled my nose. I could taste my victory, MMMMMMMmmm! I let him sit floating and half dead, moved onto the next one.

Several red clouds later, I reunited with my date. "You aren't too bad for a salmon.", she said through her serrated teeth. "Well, I do what I can. I always liked to eat.... I mean, it's fitting I taste terrible with such carnovirian tendencies." She blushed. And we feasted on the fish around us.